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Welcome to Miss Molly and Aspergers! :)

Hello there, welcome to my blog Miss Molly and Aspergers! My name is Molly and I am a teenage girl with Aspergers Syndrome.

I have created this blog to help create awareness of Autism Spectrum Disorder.

TIP: Search Aspergers on Facebook and you will find dozens of amazing communities and support networks! If you choose to interact in one of these communities, you may even make some great friends who are also Aspies, like I have.

Why you may find use in my blog:
Insight, support, self-research/experience and understanding (awareness) will be covered in the content of Miss Molly and Aspergers, including the following subjects and more:

- Bullying/dealing with peers
- Surviving in social situations
- Hobbies/Obsessions and Interests
- School/Life
- Communication - Social skills - Understanding spoken and unspoken language norms.
- Sensory Issues/ sound, smell, sight, taste, feel, (textures) - the ability to experience heightened senses - and coping with the strong diversions (intolerance)
- Importance of Routine and Structure
- Friendships
- Coping with Meltdowns and dealing with the aftermath (consequences - I.e Social embarrassment)
- Dealing with people who do not acknowledge the existence of The Autism Spectrum (ASD). People who therefore are unable to acknowledge the rhyme and reasons for your differences.

Copy Cats Beware

© Molly Tylor and Miss Molly and Aspergers, 2013-2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Molly Tylor and Miss Molly and Aspergers with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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Friday, August 24, 2012

Avoiding Confussion

 Aspie: A person who has Aspergers

As an Aspie I find it difficult in many daily situations; To interpret and follow simply instructions.
I often find myself asking questions to clarify what it is I am meant to be doing, but people get annoyed because I clarify too often. It is important you know I am not trying to be annoying I am just trying to understand.

Here is an example:

An Aspergers boy is asked simply to clear the table.
He would then follow your instructions and clear everything off the table. This including unfinished meals and drinks. In the eyes of the nerotypical person he is considered silly or stupid. However if he had asked before clearing the table: "Do I leave their drinks, what if people are still eating?"
He would also be considered silly, stupid or annoying for asking these questions rarely asked by neurotypical people. He may also be accused of not listening to instructions.

Aspies understand the words you say (What we hear directly). Not the meaning behind what you say. Especially sarcasm, jokes and when you tell us things that are not genuine.

Most Apies believe what they hear. We are not given enough time to think about the other properties and meanings of the words spoken, the majority of neurotypical people wouldn’t need this time because in my words: they just get it.
I find that I react before I have the time to think about what has been said, and I’ve done this for so long now it’s a habit. The influence of this is that I am afraid to stand there thinking because if I were to do this I would find myself thoroughly thinking it through as we do (we are not satisfied until we’ve looked at it from all angles).
This is when someone waves a hand in front of me to see if I am paying attention. I am often told I appear to be in my own world at times. This is usually when I am over thinking.

What we want you to understand:
I want people to understand and tolerate myself and others with Aspergers.
Our attributes shouldn’t be used against us or to humiliate us.
As well as this; you need to accept and answer our questions. They might sound silly or annoying however the point is we are people who deserve understanding.
Think about how it would feel to be in our situations. Where you would be in trouble for something you can’t help doing.
Considered rude, stupid, annoying? Well this is how we feel every day when faced common social situations.

~ Molly xo

Friday, August 3, 2012

The Mental Health System

Last week my mum contacted Mental Health here to see if I could go back. I was dissmissed from seeing a physiatrist there after they assumed I didn't need anymore help and because I was too old to be seen.

That was last year. I have faced apon new struggles. I have been hit with Depression again after sometime and my anxiety is unbearable.
I am struggling to see positives, all I do is dwell on the negatives. I have lost all interest in my hobbies that entertained and kept me happy.
It is very common for children and adults on the Autism Spectrum to have low serotonin levels in their brain. Therefore mum and I think I should have my medication reviewed and have alternative Antidepressants introduced.

The medication I am taking is: 20mg Lexapro (Maximum dosage) and 1.5mg of Rispirodol.
I feel the Lexapro is doing nothing at all. I was previously taking 10mg. 
2 years ago it was increased to 20mg. It is unsafe to increase it passed the maximum dosage requirement. Its time I had it changed.
Mum recieved a phone call yesterday from the head of Mental Health after my issues were taken to the board to be assessed. He simply said. The medications fine. Its appropiate. There is no need for us to see Molly.

That is the biggest thing that ticks me off! After all the issues and troubles I explained to the lady on the phone last week. he thinks its fine!? He hasn't even met me, how would he know!
That brings me back to an experience last year.
I was seen by a physiatrist for a medication review and he refused to change anything, because in the first five minutes he met me, he observed, that I was simply, just painfully shy!
I am very disappointed because I feel like the system doesn't care. they are suppose to help people, not shoo them away when they defiantly need help!

I am seeing a psychologist however through a private practice. This lady I see has no control over my medication. She costs over $150 a session which it is hard for my mum to afford. Therefore I can only see her every 2-3 weeks. There also is limited amount of sessions you can have with her a year. About 10-12.

Please share your stories.

~ Molly xo

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Bullying

Bullying is a major concern for Aspies
It is common for us to be bullied, humiliated and harassed. Simply because many people do not understand us or want to understand us.

In my experience even when I have explain to a person my different behaviors and reasons I act this way.
Most of the adolescences (even adults) who have bullied me have chosen not to understand.
I believe this is because they are scared of the unknown and are close-minded. 
Instead of learning about Aspergers they find it easier to ignore the information we provide.
Bullying occurs as a result. This is because they haven't learn how certain things we do are not to annoy them or irritates them. They do not understand it is who we are, we cannot help but be ourselves.

This year I am facing a new school for the first time.
So far I have told my new peers about my Aspergers. I thought (as I mentioned in my very first blog post);
I was bullied and mistreated in primary school because I never told anyone I had Aspergers. Therefore they didn't understand the way I did and perceived things.
So I this is why I decide to tell the people I meet. I told all of my peers I socialized with; I have Aspergers.
I've let them all know I am literal, and that I can misunderstand unclear or unspecific instructions.
Yet it is just as it was back in primary school.
It has worked out no better then if they didn't know at all I have Aspergers.
Reason being they won't take the time to listen to me or interpret the information I have told them.

I have tried sharing these posts on Facebook. However there are people who just do not care.
You can spread awareness as much as you like. However you cannot possibly make them understand unless they actually want to listen or read the information.

I have figured this:
Those who matter will listen and read because they care about you, and how being misunderstood affects you.
I see it this way: If someone hasn't taken the time to read or listen to the information you provided for them. Yet they continue to play pranks on you and tell you confusing jokes, even when you've told them hundreds of times, you are literal.
They are not worth anything to you. because this proves they simply DO NOT CARE.

What do you do about people who do not care about you? You do not care about them back!


In my experience. I like people to like me. Therefore I am nice to absolutely everyone at my own expense.
Constantly I find myself letting people get away with trampling all over me like I'm a door mat.

I worry about what people would do and say if I stood up to them. I never want the peace being disturbed and people not liking me.
So I let everyone get away with everything they do to me. This is when I am lucky to have my amazing mum.
Even when I say: No! do not intervene, just let it go!
She will ignore what I have said and go ahead with getting authority involved. This is because she knows I will keep getting treated badly until I have stood up for myself.
I never did this because I have always worried I will get someone in trouble.

I understand what I HEAR. Usually I cannot pick the MEANING behind what I hear.
If someone is being nice and encouraging me to do things, I will think it is because they are being genuine and are excited by what I can do.
However time after time it turns out it was a plan to humiliate and embarrass me.

MY ADVICE:
Let your parents intervene!
If they don't, because you want everything to be calm, and want to be liked.
People will think they can do anything to you and they won't ever stop! So stand up for yourself! 
If you cannot do it on your own, please let your parents, guardians or a trusted relation help.

REMEMBER:
Do not worry what others say, they don't matter to you.
You will not be in school your whole life!
There is a huge world out there beyond the school yard and classroom.
So do the best you can in school. Achieve at what you are good at!
You will be able to succeed in life, look back and be grateful you spent more time worrying about your future beyond school instead of trying to fit in and be liked.

I can also tell you now. Yes there are many people out there who do not want to understand you. However that is not to say there isn't!
There are many people, just as many out there who are open-minded, caring, understanding, accepting, tolerant and appreciative.
Be yourself! The right people, these people, will come to you in time. Continue to be your amazing self who has so many brilliant qualities. You will attract these people. Just as I have done.

I have had bad experiences with many bullies, close-minded and nasty people. However I have just as many if not more people who love me for who I am and appreciate my Aspergers qualities. There is hope for you too!

I better finish this post now, before it gets any longer. Hehe.

- Molly xo