My Journey Off Antidepressants after being on them for 20 years (Age 4 to 24)

I am still pinching myself how well I have been off of antidepressants after having been on them for so long (20 years). I reached my goal of being off them before my adult brain matures at 25.

What has helped me:

- Self love and compassion

- spirtuality (healing my chakras, practicing being present and staying grounded in my body, mediation, practicing detachment from the thoughts, emotions, outcomes and desires which create suffering and choosing letting go and acceptance) 

- using natural therapies

- practising self disapline (in a compassionate way. I.e making myself get out of bed, eat healthy, budget my money because I know its for my highest good)

- Shadow work and inner child work (accepting the parts of me I ignored and rejected growing up and integrating them into my life to become whole so my subconscious doesn't control my emotions and actions. Listening to parts and giving compassion to the parts of me which felt hurt, unheard, abandoned and uncared for)

- Balancing the masculine/Yang part of me which needs to feel in control, constantly busy, taking action, achieving, giving, producing etc and learning to balance it with my feminine/Ying allowing me to go with the flow, enjoy the still, rest and recover, recieve, nuture etc.

- healthy diet

- exercise

- keeping creative and practicing self expression through my creativity

- choosing myself over conforming or rejecting myself to blend into the crowd (finding and embodying my authenitc/higher self)

- sitting with and processing my emotions allowing myself to feel them then release them.

When I allow myself to feel and cry I literally feel brand new afterwards. Its the resistance to feeling which creates prolonged suffering and can cause further consequences when your emotions aren't chanelled in healthy ways, they control you instead of you controlling them. You have to feel it to heal it. 

I have realised from meditation alone how much fear and being too hard on yourself causes depression. I am able to catch my thoughts now when im avoiding doing something that will benefit me but fear is stopping me. I accept that its ok to take baby steps and forgive myself for not feeling able to do said things. And guess what happens. After letting go of the resistance and the voice that beats me up with the 'shoulds'. I find it so easy to get up and do the action I was afraid to do. I carry out the action from a place of compassion instead of beating myself up for feeling incapable. 

So thats what I have been doing with my time 😅

Disclaimer:

To those who are on antidepressants and/or suffer depression. I have had a long hard road to hell and back so by no means is this post meant to make it sounds like it was easy. The first time I came off them it wasn't a success because I had not fully learnt how to utilize these important practices. I'm still learning and practicing, there are still days I slip up.

Chapter 2 of Miss Molly & Aspergers: Womanhood as a Women on The Autism Spectrum

Hello,
I recently have been contemplating writing a new post here on Miss Molly and Aspergers, yet I have not known or have come to know what to write about. I have asked myself many questions; is this blog still relevant or going to continue to relate to the Autism world and upon asking myself this question I got my answer. of course! I do not want to scare those of you who are still in your teen years, however I am not going to lie, there is a whole other ball game with Autism in Adulthood and Adulthood itself.

I have been gifted upon graduating into the Adulthood a bigger pond to swim in. Below I am going to list the positives and the not so positive and those not so positive points I am going to be using Miss Molly and Asperger's to write for you; my hindsight, experiences and development as a young woman and adult on the Autism Spectrum. I hope to give you some skills to have ready in your kit which can help ease your transition.
P.s Even if you are not on the Autism Spectrum as any young adult or even older adult, if any of my advice is relevant or helpful to you are more then welcome here! So please don't be shy to subscribe!

Independence/Freedom:                                                                                             
Responsibilities/ Library fines - Its on you!

More people/places/options to make friends:                      
More opportunities to be taken advantage of (A sad but true fact and there is no need to be discouraged! There are plenty of kind hearted people out there too. I have a few solid people in my tribe and I wouldn't have found them or been certain of their true natures if I had not have met and been involved with some of the crueler people in this world - you just can't trust everyone and us Aspies are naturally very trusting... more on that to come!)

Live in your own place:
Solely up to you to keep that roof over your head 

Choose when and where to study:
Need to motivate yourself (now you don't have a parent telling you to get out of bed to go to uni anymore)

Can date whoever you like:
The only boundaries in place are your own - so if they are a jerk you haven't got your parent to back you up on why they cant come around anymore.

You can choose whatever you like to spend your money on:                                        
Just remember Rent, Food, Bills come first! You might make a few mistakes here I'm still learning trust me you can't eat that brand new handbag! 

Its up to you when and (IF) you do housework!         
"The house is gross and I swear the clothes in the pile are coming from a vortex because I don't think I even wore those - I might just wear them as they look unworn and I have nothing clean! I can't eat because there is nothing in the whole house which is clean to eat off... oh wait maybe the ice cream container lid under the sink will work for a plate!"

You can stay up as late as you like!                
If you thought meeting Lisa for coffee to work on that assignment the following morning you might be greeting her already having had 3 coffees or you don't show up at all!

Your dog or cat gets sick?                                 
The Vet isn't going to ask for your parents credit card.

You can eat whatever you like for dinner!                   
Be careful here as you may or may not get malnourished or develop a dairy intolerance from only eating a pint of Connoisseur a day with a protein bar now and then for lunch or end up crying over how much Uber Eats made out of you plus five kilograms.

That is all I have for tonight because if I'm not careful I'm gonna struggle getting up to in fact meet my best friend for coffee at teen am haha! 

I hope I haven't scared you, you don't need to be and I don't want you to avoid making similar mistakes because if I didn't make these I wouldn't have learnt from them or be able to give you this post and help you along the way.

Thank you so much for stopping in, speak again soon,

Love Molly

Its been awhile... Life got adventurous while I was away growing into a woman

Hiya,

I must first start by saying oh my gosh... where did the time go??!
writing this post today I would like to inform you I am 21 going on 22 these days, and my gosh how much I have grown up!
This isn't such a bad thing haha. I have so much to share from the past 4 years now, its going to take some time, though now I will be able to share my experiences, life skills and how I cope as an adult Aspergers woman in my 20's.

I am now going to attempt to give my briefest summary possible as I would love to put together more specific posts which I can articulate so they will be useful for you and others instead of me beginning to write a book here and now about the last 4 years of y life haha.

So...
I made it into independence. (not a smooth adventure... but I wouldn't be where I am now if it had of been)
I am living out of home on my own lease with my amazing boyfriend.
I finished my jewellery course.
I now have a joint studio/workshop space with four of my peers I graduated with.
If you are interested to have a look at how I have been going with my jewellery see my webpage Molly Frances Jewellery Design.

I got to keep my Blue Heeler Archer, he moved out of my mums place with me. and he isn't so young anymore. His 11 now and I am having to cope with seeing him grow old and tired with arthritis. He doesn't run like he use to, slowed right down my poor boy. I love him lots.

I am going to taper this post off here now as it is 2 minutes to midnight here and I could easily spend the early hours of the morning writing away haha.

I hope to hear from you too about how your journey over the last 4 years has gone.

I have missed you.

x Molly

Common Aspergers & ASD Traits

Hi All!

I have been thinking it would be a good idea to refresh people of the traits of Asperger’s and what being an Aspie entails. It has been awhile since I have made a post on the overall aspects of Asperger’s, so I feel a refreshment is in order!

What it means to have Asperger’s/ Common Aspie Traits: (these traits are often disputed in different orders and combinations (no one Aspie will share all of the same traits)

1 . Lack of or too much eye contact.

2. Talks a lot about their interests, loves to share!

3. Has obsessive interests that are a huge part of their life and career aspirations. (I.e. If an Aspie is into computer programming, they will most likely aim to achieve their highest in this area. Thus, making it their career field).

4. Has an extremely good long term memory and a not so good short term memory. This includes things which are of great interest to an Aspie’s mind or caused a significant emotional effect such as bullying experiences. We can remember even the smallest of those details such as the person’s name, despite having experienced this in grade 1. The same applies for vice versa, such as a person who contributed an amazing and gratifying effect on our lives or were an extremely compassionate person that one would be immensely appreciative of encountering. These memories are likely to stick to our mind, being permanently glued to our subconscious and will unlikely be forgotten.

Our short term memory however, is compromised at times. Normally because of ideas and thoughts pertaining to an interest or desire. Therefore, anything that’s not interesting to us at the time will go in one ear and out the other whilst other ideas are playing on our mind.

5. Different sense of humor (can find the strangest of things amusing or funny)

6. Has sensory issues to do with a heighten sense of sound, touch ,feel, taste, and sight.

7. Can have trouble communicating their needs or intentions (a common occurrence is being misinterpreted by other people. Also misinterpreting ourselves, the intentions of others, and their motives.

8. Delayed responsiveness in situations (has a longer processing time)

9. Coordination issues can be common too.

10. An intense need of routine and familiarity. One often becomes distressed when changes are made or are unexpected. As we grow older we can learn to adjust to changes. Compared to NT’s who adjust drastically, Aspie’s tend to require more time to gradually develop the ability to adjust and cope with change. (stepping stones, rather than a large meteorite)

Well, that's a few pointers for now. Thank you for reading as usual! Have a nice weekend!
- Miss Molly x

Sensory Overload

Hello again!

So what are sensory issues/ overloads?

Many people who have Autism and Aspergers can have a heightened sense of, taste, touch, sound, feel and sight.
A sensory overload is a common cause of a 'Meltdown'. This is typically a result of having to deal with a real dislike and discomfort of certain textures and the inability to function and process too many sounds and sights at once. Outbursts are common in such situations because processing becomes extremely difficult. Aspies can fall behind in class or misunderstand instructions due to these sensory issues. This results in further trauma as those who do not understand 'sensory issues/overloads' (teachers, class mates, authority figures) will deem the behaving Aspie as rude or misbehaving. When in fact their behaviour is a result of having a 'sensory overload' not an intention to misbehave.

My Experiences (may be different to other Aspies):

1. I can not process more then one sensory situation at one time.
For example: If two or more people are talking in the same room as me, while I try to watch the television. It deems as an impossible task for me to do.

2. I have experienced having my little sister make noises and crack silly jokes at me while I am on the phone to someone. In these situations I fail to interpret all of the information said by the person on the other end of the line.

3.Sudden and very unexpected noises will cause me to freak out physically. I have felt embarrassed on many occasions after my body has experienced jolts and spasm like movements. This is due to the arise of an unexpected loud noise, thus having no prior knowledge of needing to interpret.

4. Smell. I often smell things earlier or stronger then other people. My sense of smell is heightened. Example: If the fireplace had been lite and caused some smoking; even though my family believe the smell had dissipated, I can continue to smell its linger for days. Many times I have said 'I can smell....." And people would reply "I don't know what're you're on about".


5. Sight- I can not handle a sudden image or object coming in close proximity of my line of sight or from a blind sight. This is similar in the way of noises - unexpected or loud in movement.

6. Touch/Feel- Textures are a big issue for Aspies. Certain feelings are uncomfortable and make it difficult for to us to maintain a sense of comfort.
As a young girl (and still to this day), I removed tags and strings off clothing and could not handle the feel of thick wool jumper and oily feelings on my hands (finger food. I.e. chicken drumsticks).
These oily textures are unpleasant for me and other Aspies. Having to deal with these feelings are often avoided by using eating utensils, gloves or cleaning my hands straight after consuming.
I also could not stand handling fish bait with my hands as the feel and smell would be obvious to me on my hands for an extensive periods of time afterwards. I remember trying to get the smell out of my hands with vinegar after coming home from fishing, even when others would perceive your hands as being 'clean'.
Many times whilst road traveling, my mum had to stock up on wet wipes for me, or I would be irritable if I couldn't clean textures off my hands.
Also dish washing can be unpleasant for me too. As I get frustrated with not being able to get the oiliness out of dishes and then having to deal with the dry and funny feel of my hands afterwards , as a result of this and the soapy hot water.

Conclusion:
So basically sensory issues are a heightened sense of feel, and the difficulty of interpreting numerous noises/movements/instructions. Having these heightened senses, when an unexpected noise and sight occurs, it is in reason to be frightening and a struggle to deal with.
For these reasons many Aspies avoid big crowds, loud concerts, night clubs, 3D-Movies, shopping centers and public transport. Sensory overloads in these areas in particular are common for us. As well as avoiding over powering fragrances, certain clothing textures, certain foods, toiletries and products.

Thank you for reading!
Question: Do you have any sensory issues or sensory overload experiences to share?

x Molly

Importance of a Comfortable and Organised Environment

Hello !
Today I want to share with you the importance it is for me personally to have an orderly and pleasant environment to live, work and relax in.
Today after many months of having the same room arrangement, it began to clutter and accumulate dust under and behind furniture, as well the general system of my room beginning to slack. I also feel making a change like this is a good way of welcoming in new good and positive opportunities (mood, life, productivity, etc). As having the same room arrangement through troubled times and/or depressive periods. It generally keeps and preserves that negative mood set for me. So in order to change that mood set, I changed my room, the soul environment I wake up in and go to sleep at night. I feel so uplifted, motivated, relaxed and happy with my new space now.

Today I changed my room completely around and cleaned it up.
I cannot sleep or work in an environment that is not kept.
As well as the importance of cleanliness and organisation. I like to make my room my own special space and retreat to enjoy. Candles, ornaments, soft blankets, cute containers, pictures, posters, incense, and my fashion and stationary items kept neatly and niceness are what make an enjoyable space for me.

Aspies either thrive in an orderly environment or need not attend to keep an orderly environment at all to feel comfortable in.

However this is my preference and organisation is the best way for me to stay motivated and relaxed.

Here are the pictures of the finished result! Including my new water fountain (relaxation purposes), dream catcher, candles and my new jewellery storage cupboard :)
You can also see my feature wall of my 'works'. Including my Drawings and Photography and Digital Productions.

I would love to know whether you 'require your environment to be clean and pleasant" or 'you don't mind it to be not kept'

Hope you all enjoy the rest of your weekend.

Bye for now,

x Miss Molly

Positives of Having an Aspergers Friend

1.What you see is what you get:
(Excluding first time social situations).As Aspies we can have time periods where our full selves gradually evolve around you. 
When we meet people for the first time we reserve ourselves to start with. I guess its a natural instinct for all really. To summarize: If you have known an Aspie for at least a few months and had regular social interaction with them and you can observe they are comfortable around you. Then its pretty certain by this time you have seen all of who we are. We cannot contain ourselves (personality traits) for excessive periods of time around people we begin to feel comfortable with. So rest assure, we are who we appear to be. 

2. Loyalty:
We are extremely loyal to people who are good to us. We go through life exploring for good friendships, with many heartbreaks along the way. 
When we meet a good person, we will appreciate their friendship to the very end. However our loyalty is not to be taken advantage of, which is fair enough. No one should be obligated to stay loyal to an loyal friend, whether you have Aspergers or not. Saying this, it can take a great length of time for an Aspie to realise a toxic friend. We can be easily fooled by sweet smiles. We are a target for people with two-faced syndrome haha. This is due to our belief of seeing the best in others. Though when we do finally realise, we will move on and look forward to meeting new people with mutual respect and loyalty. My point is we value good friends extremely well, and stay true to you for as long as you are true to us.

3. Fun and Humour:
We can have an unpredictable sense humor and the ability to surprise you at anytime. This makes for unforgettable memories of fun and good times. Only two weeks ago, my neurotypical best friend and I were reciting memories from 1-2 years ago. These moments we had were just too good to forget. We laughed all over again like it was yesterday. Maybe I will mention some of our funny moments sometime soon.

4.Trustworthiness/Honesty:
People with Aspergers find it very difficult to tell lies; we can, although eventually we will reveal the truth. The majority of these will be little white lies, technically harmless. However we can not hold on to the guilt for very long, no matter how small it is.
However our honesty should not be mistaken, as we are extremely trustworthy with other peoples issues. To this day; I have kept my first time best friend's crush a secret, since primary (elementary) school (2006). (one of hundreds of examples). I have actually forgotten the fellas name, proof of how long its been. You can 100% rest assure in the fact, you can talk to me about anything and I have and forever will keep my word. My best friend Hannah is my referee hehe.

5. Uniquness
It is very likely if you have an Aspie friend they may stand apart from mainstream influences just a little bit or maybe a lot.
Typically you may notice we may have a different dress sense or taste in music not typical to our peers. For example I love vintage clothing and 70's and 80's rock music. I love Guns and Roses, Bon Jovi, Cold Chisel and Fleetwood Mac (a few examples). 

I have met many Aspies with such interests/hobbies/obsessions:
- Science, Computer Programming, Art, Mathematics, Biology, Geometry, Space, Nature, Photography, Creative Writing, Animals, Conservation. Just to name a few.

Additional information about our interests:
When an Aspie becomes interest in a subject, it usually, in most cases becomes our life long aspiration. Because of this, we can process, learn and teach knowledge about these particular subjects to a professional level. When we are passionate about such things we can excel at them. We have a tendency to focus to extreme. Sometimes you may not see me for days, as I will be working away on a passion of mine. Historic scientists have been rumored to have had Aspergers or were savants (savants are people who have extreme forms of Aspergers - usually gifted to the max with one thing and no ability to perform at anything else). They hid away from society to such an extent because of their focus and determination of their passions. This resulted in such things as light bulbs being invented haha. 

As usually this post has gone off subject just a tiny bit haha. I cannot retain myself from given the most detail possible, whether it fits in to context or not. 

Hope you liked this post, and have a good day :)

My almost 18 years - Share and Tell

Hi There :)
I am extremely overwhelmed! I will be 18 years old this coming Friday (1 week away exactly!)!
I am so astonished by how much I have already fit into my life even before reaching adulthood.

I have completed my secondary education and have begun developing my dream career, after so much anticipation.

I have lived all over Australia, including very rural and isolated places due to my mum being an Art Teacher.
I have met new relatives in 2013 after moving to Perth from Queensland Australia. I discovered I have lots of second and third cousins I never new of. I also met my Great Aunty for the first time.

Some highlights of my life so far:

• At 9-10 years old. I lives on an aboriginal community known as Wadeye or Port Keats. We were living in a town isolated from everywhere because of bush land, un-cemented roads (corrugated), waterways etc.

• I learnt many words of Murranpatha, the local Indigenous language. I had confrontations with wild salt water crocodiles! I experienced so much there, especially involving the bush life. I went tucker hunting with the locals, fishing, scavenging, swimming in water holes and a lot more!

•  Another amazing experience; Once I was allowed by the pilot of our small plane, from Wadeye to Darwin City, to be seated in the cot pit with him! of course I didn't get to fly the plane but it was exciting to have a front view!

• In 2008 I became an Aunty for the first time on Christmas Day! A couple years following, I became an Aunty of two! :)

• I have studied through numerous Distance Education programs, I had my own classroom at home set up for me. In Rainbow Beach it was situated in the shed.
•  I vividly remember when a 2 and a half meter Python slithered past the garage door. I rolled it down and stayed trapped inside until mum came out and luckily the Python had moved on.
• Our house here attracted many critters due to the fact our back yard directly entered the local national rainforest. These other critters include: Meter long Goannas, Bush Turkeys, Spiders and poisonous snakes. I remember being chased around the house too many times by Goannas because they wanted food.

•  I went to North Keppel Island in Queensland for a School Camp when I was 13 years old. It was brilliant! I lived on this island in a cabin with other students for 5 days.

Experiences I had on NK Island:

• Snorkelling, cannoning, plankton trawling, swimming mid deep in the bay between North Keppel and Yeppoon.

• Places I have lived include:

Darwin NT, Geraldton WA, Boddington WA, Fremantle WA, Kambalda WA, Mangoplah NSW, Hervey Bay QLD, Boonooroo QLD, Rainbow Beach QLD, St Helens TAS, Tom Price WA.

I have made and left a trail of life long friends all over the country due to my family's gypsy habits.

I have many, many, many more stories/experiences to share. These however are the first ones that came to mind, therefore they must be the most valuable ones to share. However I have many more experiences I could tell you which will be worth your entertainment.

I will most definitely make a post after my 18th Celebrations! As I am sure I have some lovely presents coming my way and a surprise birthday cake my little sister is making for me. Not only that I will have the good company of family and good friends!

xx Molly

An update after many months...

Hello,
I have not been here in so long, I have had a very eventful past six months... I know its four months into the new year, almost five! Happy New Year!! Hehe.
So before I begin some new and more interesting posts to do with... living with Aspergers.

I certainly think I should give an update on what has been happening for me:

• I got accepted at the beginning of this year... into my dream course... An Advance Diploma of Jewellery Design. Which goes for 3 years!

• I got awarded a scholarship which has significantly helped me with my course materials costs. Jewellery production... especially due to the use of precious metals... is very expensive.

• I met my long distance boyfriend for the first time in person this year! He is also an Aspie which is amazing, in the fact we relate and understand each other.

• I discovered I have a talent in drawing and I have kept up with my photography.

• I have developed independence... as far as... travelling with public transport, and using my initiative to get to any place I need or want to go. My mum explains how proud she is of me. :)

• I have made new friends and am finding my new adult education atmosphere a blessing. It is amazing how different it is to high school. It is so nice to be somewhere where people have mutual interests, ideas and hobbies.

•  I turn 18 years old in 21 days! Can you believe I created... Miss Molly and Asperger's when I was 15!

Please feel free to share your new years news too ! :)

~ Miss Molly x

Suicide is not your only option!

How do you keep going, when all hope seems lost? How to keep picking up the pieces, when you've picked them up again and again all your life.

Life is a journey, an obstacle course, yes it can be hard, very hard, to the point... That last option is playing in your mind on repeat. My dad could not handle lifes obstacles. I know he was just one of many many! And there it is! the use of 'past tense'... 'Was'..The reality he or the loved one you have lost, is not here anymore, here as a living person. 

Yes, people do care, you may not realise it, or maybe that few monority of people who 'don't care, ie bullies' have convinced you that all do not care. 

Now step out of your shoes for just a minute, I know this may be very difficult, your disconection from the positive, your sense of 'nothing is worth it anymore' ...does indeed affect your judgement. 

Are you a mum, a dad, a sibling, an aunty, uncle, cousin, grandparent, a best friend, a lover? How are these people going to feel? The ones who do care? And believe me they do! You not only take away your life, but you take away a massive chunk of theirs too. What do you think is going to be their reaction, when they hear your pronounced death? How would you deal knowing one of these very close people to you...couldn't handle life anymore? That you will live the rest of your life, only having their memories... Thats it, memories.. memories you will live over and over each time you are trigged with the thought of your loved one. And the endless thoughts of what the future could have been for them and.. You. 

I think about my dad... I think about the way he chose to end his life.. The way that has left me utterly devistated... and how he isn't here anymore to see how I have grown up... Into the person I have become... He isn't here to see how even though, things have got extremely hard at times for me... I kept going... And I wish more then anything I could have been there to convince him... 'Life will get better, hold on'... Because its true. Life does get better. I am not saying, that you won't see any more of the obstacles life dishes out... Because no one can promise you that... But I can promise you... If you stay and stick around for lifes journey... You will encounter the best things of life yet to come... You will see that its worth it! Holding on through the negative will make you even more grateful for the positive moments and endless posibilities that are within your reach... But they won't be, if you take away your life, all those possibilities will vanish... Along with you.

 Suicide is not the only option you have!

These obstacles are here for a reason. If life was so easy for everyone, would we really be living? If there were no obstacles, we would just be simply existing.. Because we wouldn't know what the good things are or how to appreciate them... If everything life throws out was easy!

The things we come across in life, are lessons that are learnt and to be learned, they are the very things that teach us how to appreciate the good.

Every bad experience you have paths your path of life... They allow you to build youself into the person you are meant to be. Don't end it here! 

If you are feeling suicidal, Right in this moment, please call someone for help, and I mean really call for help! an emergency department!!

If you are feeling depressed and hopeless talk to your family, your friends and/or seek professional help! 

Be reasured! 

People are here! They are here for you! They care!!! Don't give up! The is so much more life has to offer you!

--Molly xxxx

How to deal with Depression (Written with Positivity)

Hello everyone :o)

Today I am talking to you about a common experience Aspies have. Depression.

Aspies are very susceptible to depression as you can imagine. However today this post is going to be focused on positivity, as this is needed by most people dealing with Depression. Therefore I will try my best not to expand on anything which is negative.

Being inside 24/hrs a day is a huge contributor, as your levels of vitamin D begin to decrease. Causing common physical complaints, (itchy skin, feeling 'yuck', feeling tired) and mental complaints (irritability, moodiness, Anxiety) and of course, Depression.

I well know people who have Depression lack motivation. So its very well for me to say, do this and that. However if you have Depression and are reading this page it is very certain you have recognized you have Depression and you want to get better. 
So my main priority with this post is to provide you with the information of what will help you once you have recognized this.

How do we cope with Depression?

From my experience and from listening to others with Depression the best way to tackle it is to get busy! And get out into the sunshine!

There are antidepressants available which are very helpful with re-motivating a person with Depression. I highly recommend if you are really suffering, see your doctor and discuss your options with them. 
My main focus for this post is the simple and effective lifestyle changes which also help 
antidepressants to be more effective.

So what do you do?

• Plan for tomorrow, tomorrow is a new beginning, a fresh start. Quote: "Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of my life".

• Plan to get up early, have a shower, get dressed, carry out your full routine for the morning so you are ready to go anywhere.

• Go outside! Go shopping, go to the park, go for a walk, anything involving getting active.

• If you have nowhere to go, even just sit in the sun in your back/front yard ! (with sun protection of course) you do not need to sit in full sun to get the benefits.

• This will allow your mind and body to soak up some much needed vitamin D!

What is the next step:

Remove anything from your surroundings that is making you feel negative.

This may include;

• Throwing out old pages from your diary

• Deleting or hiding items on Facebook (such as; peers from school statues/videos/images about gossip, bullying, fights etc) even removing Facebook all together, even for a short period until you are feeling better.

• Open your windows, let the light in!

• Tidy your room, clean up any mess 

• Limit the time you spend inside

• Limit the time you spend on the internet

Now you need to think long term, what can keep me occupied? (something proactive)

Your new hobby could include (or pick up on an old hobby):

• Exercising

• Walking

• Swimming

• Gym

• Bike riding

• Art and craft (to make it more affordable look in second hand shops for materials)

• Jewelry making

• Photography

• Gardening

• Reading

• Poetry

• Singing

• Dancing

• Roller skating

• Card making

• Sewing/pattern making

• Plan and carry out a project, such as paper macheing furniture for a dolls house

• Awareness Cause

• Fund raising 

• Surfing

• BMX riding

• Skateboarding

• Spend time with animals

• Fishing

These are just some examples you can search in Google for more lists of potential hobbies.

Please Note:

This is my best advice, and it has helped me immensely, however I can not guarantee this will help everyone 100% as I know there are many with severe depression that needs medical attention. My best tip which applies to everyone; Do something about it now, whether that is talking to someone for help, medical attention, or these simple lifestyle changes I have provided.

Much love,

Xo Miss Molly oX

What It Is Like To Be Me - A Girl With Aspergers Syndrome

My goal for this post is to give you an insight on what it is like for a person to have Aspergers Syndrome. 

Eye Contact:

Everyday I go out into the world feeling worried and fearful of situations where people will expect eye contact from me. I know I can't possibly possibly give it with absolute ease. Usually eye contact with me is awkward and they are left wondering why I can't look them in the eye.

It is impossible to tell everyone I have Aspergers.  I am not going to tell every shop keeper or person I come across.

Bullying:

I have been bullied! By people younger then me, the same age as me, even much older then me, including adults.

I have grown to fear people talking negatively about me. As I have experienced this most of my life.

This is where Aspies are sometimes called 'paranoid', which I can be at times. When I hear people mentioning my name, I instantly think its something bad about me. 

This is a result of the many times at school I had walked in on my peers speaking badly about me.

Friendship:

I need absoulute acceptance when it comes to friendship making and socializing which is so hard to find. Most of the time peers do not look beyond my Aspergers (they see its negatives, not its positives) to see my good qualities (In a few posts I have outlined what my qualities are and I think you can agree, they are the most things you want in a friend). 

I struggle very much to make friends, and I struggle even harder to keep them. I cannot count how many times my heart has been broken from as loss of a friendship.

Obviously:

I often say very obvious things. A little known fact:  Aspies like me need to release our thoughts. It is part of they way we process situations and our surroundings. Many people find this annoying though. Which is frustrating as we try very hard to contain our thoughts.

Literally:

One of the most common traits of Aspergers is being literal. For me this means I do not understand double meanings (I have learnt some but I have to think about them). It means I am easy to fool. This is where I have been the subject of many pranks. Because of this trait I often feel dumb or stupid.

In the past I have come home and cried for hours from a hard day at school of being pranked. Because no matter how hard I try, I know I cannot be what you call 'street smart' and socialize easily like other people my age do. 

School Work:

With school work, I am confident and I know when I have the chance to concentrate fully I can do amazing work. Maths is my strongest subject which I actually enjoy doing.

However in the school environment I can fail easily. Not because I lack intelligence,  but because of distractions. As well as having not been given enough time to complete my work to the best of my ability.

With my school work I use a lot of detail. Many times I have written a thousand words over the word limit.

As my mum has said often to my teachers; I produce less work, but the work I produce is of highest quality. This is in comparison to the average neurotypical students who produces lots of work of average standard.

Hobbies/Interests:

As an aspie girl I have a few hobbies. It is well known because of Aspies large attention span when it comes to things they like. We can be found in a corner at ten o'clock in the morning and found in the same place hours after dark when we are focusing on something that interests us.

Aspies can be shining stars when it comes to an interest.

This is hugely evident in the way Bill Gates (a fellow Aspie) became so successful with his computer programs. 

Personally, I like to photograph and make jewellery and I never fail to have amazing comments and compliments given to me.

Unaccepting People:

I deal with many people who are intolerant of me.

I am always left feeling like I am annoying them when I am simply being me and carrying out my tasks. It actually affects me deeply to be called annoying. I'm sure it affects other Aspies too.

I am excluded constantly, because people feel its easier to socialize with my other family members or friends who are non-aspies. Rather then myself.

Psychiatrists/Psychologists:

Having been officially diagnosed with Aspergers at 9 years old. Before and after then I have meet many many psychologists and doctors with so many different opinions; from OCD to just saying I am painfully shy.  I would say I have seen at least 10 different psychologists and psychiatrists in my life time and I know many of you would have similar experiences.

This has caused my family and I a lot of grief. An example of this is they have treated me for OCD, which did not work and only caused meltdowns. 

Many times I have felt hopeless, because of the psychiatrists inflexible thinking, they refuse to see the way my mum and I see it. They always have to be more right then the previous psychiatrists.

I have just giving you a number of my experiences with having Aspergers. This is what I have to deal with everyday and other Aspies too. 

~Molly xo

Dealing with Close-Minded and Unaccepting People

If you have Aspergers or support someone with Aspergers it is highly likely you have met or come across people who not only misunderstand you and Aspergers. They refuse to learn how they can understand!

As I have said many times:
You can give and provide them the information as much as you like. People are not going to read it unless they want to.
Close minded people do not change their way of thinking once they believe something.
So if they think people with Aspergers are weird, not normal or they find your differences annoying. They are going to continue to believe this no matter how much information you provide. 
We now know these people are not going to change (just like we can't change who we are).
Now this is where we need to learn how to deal and cope with these people.

The most common places you will find close minded people are:
Through social networks, such as:

• School

• In your family

• Workplace

• Family friends

• Friends of friends

• Online: such as Facebook, twitter, forums, etc.

What are the signs a person is close-minded, intolerant and misunderstanding?

• They do not tolerate your behaviours, such as common things you do and say.

• They ignore you or get easily distracted when you are explaining Aspergers to them.

• They continue to be mean and tease you for your behaviours, even after they have been told of why you are doing things in certain ways.

• They get easily irritated and annoyed by you.

• They ignore you and exclude you from social situations and events.

• They confine to people who dislike you and your behaviours.

• They find reasons to put you down all the time.

• They gossip and complain to other people all the time about you and your differences.

How do we deal with these people? 

•  Remember you cannot change them.

•  Accept you can not change them.

•  Remember they can only effect you if you let them! 

•  Brush off when they tease you or complain about you.

•  Know that if that is how they treat you, you're better off not being their friend anyways! 

• Do not change the way you are or how you do things because they want you to! In society everyone needs to learn to tolerate each other. Therefore you do not have to change because someone is intolerant of you! 

• Continuing to be the nice person you are despite how rude they are to you. This shows that you are a better person! The good people will see this and their true colours. However with this tip; if they are doing something that crosses the line to the point they are taking advanatage of your niceness and maturity. Do not hesitate to stand up for yourself, or involve someone who can help you! 

• Remember just because they say something hurtful or degrading about you, does not make it true! When people say mean things it is because they do not understand. (Such as saying, werid, crazy, unnormal, etc.)

• Remember even if they don't have Aspergers they have habits and things they do that need tolerating! Therefore they have no right to not tolerate the things you do!

• Keep smiling! Nothing gets up their nose more then seeing they don't affect you!

•  Surround yourself with people who are open-minded, accepting and tolerant. These people see the beauty in your differences unlike the close-minded people.

•  If they have made a mean statement or comment about you or Aspergers; remember they are close minded people for a reason! (They don't change their way of thinking) So do not comment back trying to prove them otherwise! They will only come back with more aggravation! I know it is hard when you see someone saying nasty things, but the best thing to do is to ignore it! By doing this you are showing you are the bigger person and avoiding the person getting nastier.

I hope I have helped you all! I have found this has helped myself tremendously having all these tips written out!  Remember you are a great person! Your are amazing and there is nothing wrong with you no matter what anyone says! Your differences are beautiful! They make you the very person you are!

Bye for now,
Love Molly xo

When an Aspie is made to feel Annoying

As an Aspergers girl I have experienced many times over, the feeling of being a nuisance because of  my actions and responses which are not considered normal social behavior.

The worst thing for an Aspie to experience is when a person struggles to understand us and our behaviour.  

The person instead of learning why we are different, they excluded us and  treat us like a nuisance.

It is uttermost heartbreaking for the Aspie to feel like they annoy everyone. 

Yet many do not see how deeply it affects the Aspie. Many Aspies end up experiencing depression because of this. I often think how can I change so people like me and not think I am annoying? But at the end of the day you can't help but be yourself especially if you have Aspergers.

I have a younger sister who is very capable at normal social behaviour. A person often finds it easier to interact and socialize with her rather then myself.

Then the cycle begins, I am left excluded and they continue to enjoy each others company while I am made to occupy myself.

What can you do differently when you meet an Aspie (how you can make them feel understood):

1. Accept them as they are

2. Tolerate them (they can't help the way they are, just as you can't help but be the person you are!)

3. Treat them the way you treat everyone else

4. Include them (don't exclude them) 

5. Return their efforts to be friendly.

We want to make friends just like everyone.

Take note of this quote: don't criticize what you don't understand.

~ Molly xo

I am back! Recently moved to Perth, WA! New Topic: Social Anxiety

Hello everyone!

I am extremely sorry I have not been around for awhile now!

As the title suggests I am now living in Perth, Western Australia. After leaving Queensland for good in July.

I have so much to share with you all! But I want to keep this post simple, because myself the queen of detailing could easily write forever! Haha! (An Aspergers trait)

I now live in a lovely suburb just outside of Perth! I have a beautiful new home! There will be pictures to come!

Leaving behind my pets (how it affects an Aspie):

I had to leave two of my cats behind in Queensland. For a person with Aspergers it is very heartbreaking. I know it is hard enough for a neurotypical person. 

People with Aspergers very commonly grow attachments to their pets. This is because our pets are really sometimes the only ones who listen to us. They never judge us.
We feel accepted by them and we are not required to explain our behaviors to them.

My new schooling:

As for schooling I am now doing Distance TAFE. A certificate which will grant me year 12 equivalency and access to further learning and career choices.

I am quite happy with this arrangement as it gives me a nice break from the pressure to socially interact everyday with people I am not use to.

My developed Social Anxiety:

That brings me to another subject!

My social anxiety has become extremely prevalent and increasing worse over the past few months!

Social anxiety usually comes in hand with Aspergers.
This is because we begin to doubt ourselves as we grow older into our teenage years and adulthood. We become more aware of how our actions are being received by other people around us.

I am now finding it increasingly difficult to look people in the eye. When I become within a close distance to people I don't know I become anixous. This is causes my facial muscles to tighen making it hard for me to smile. 

I would like to know if you experience this and can relate?

I would also like to make those aware who meet me that this fear and anxiety I have (even around people close to me) is nothing personally to do with you! 

This is my own anxiety; stemmed from self doubt, fear of rejection and being misunderstood.
One of the best things you can do for me and other people with Aspergers and Social Anxiety is to expect no eye contact from us. Accept it if we look away while you talk to us. We greatly appreciate it when people do this for us.

A big thank you!

I must thank you all for supporting me through the last two years! I began Miss Molly and Aspergers at 15 years old and I have grown and developed so much since. I am sure this is evident to you.

Again I am really sorry I have not kept update with blogging. However now I can make the effort to. I have moved away from the difficulties I had in Queensland.

So now I am starting a fresh new life which is certain to bring you all very brand new perspective to my daily life living with Aspergers.

~ Molly xo

P.S Oops this post did not end up very simple. Hehe. :)

Want to see what I have been up to?

Below are my links to my hobby pages on Facebook:

My photography: https://www.facebook.com/MissMollysPhotography?ref=hl

My collages: https://www.facebook.com/MissMollysCreativeCollages?ref=hl

My jewellery: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Beauté-Beads/194550177221673?ref=hl

Fremantle Harbour, Western Australia

Happy Birthday to Me - 17 Years Old

Hello Everyone!
I would just like to share with you yesterday was my birthday! I am 17 years old now! I can not believe it! When I first created Miss Molly and Aspergers I was 15 years old!

I had a lovely day! I got some very cool presents which include; birthday money, a new kindle-e-reader, beyonce pulse purfume, body lotion and shower cream, chocolate, a fairy dust necklace and a pliers set which I'll be using to make button jewellery!

I'm thrilled to bits! I also have two more gifts coming in the mail!

Oh and I had beef and mushroom casserole with yummy mash potato and beans for dinner! Then for my birthday cake, my favourite black forest!

I had to blow out 17 candles! Mum joked and said 17 is a fire hazzard! haha

Now I just have to get use to saying I'm 17 instead of 16!

- Miss Molly xo

A Poem about Aspergers - written by me

Hello again. :)
Today I'm sharing with you my poem I have written about my Aspergers :)

Enjoy :)

I am different in many ways.
Some of those ways,
Affect the way I behave.
I can be crazy,
I can be clever,
But then there are days I'm under the weather.

I can be awkward, I can be shy,
Someday I'm really sad,
and I want to cry.
This is when, it gets to much,
feeling alone, when it all gets too tough.
Being misunderstood, affects us very much.

I use up a lot of energy everyday.
Trying to learn and communicate effectively.
With neuro typical people in society.

Another thing is,
I have trouble with eye contact,
It's not that I'm rude.
It's just a hard thing for me to do.

Jokes and pranks, make me very vulnerable,
Because I take things literally.
But it doesn't mean I'm dumb,
It just means I think your serious.
When you tell me something,
But you just joking for fun.

I have special interests,
One or two.
I'm actually very good at,
What I choose to do.

Look at famous people with Aspergers!
Such as Bill Gates and our history's scientists!

I may talk a little too much at times,
But I am interesting so that's a plus!
So don't be put off!
I am good company,
I'm fun to be around,
And I have many good qualities.

You need to know!
Aspergers is not a weakness.
It is an amazing personality!
I wouldn't have it any other way,
If I did, I wouldn't be who I am today!

My Recent Thoughts - Maybe You Can Relate?

Today I feel alone. My only true friend is not here at school today. So I have taken this opportunity to write about how Aspies can feel alone while surrounded by people.

Having Aspergers makes it difficult for us to develop socially. It's hard for us to make friends, and it's rare (particularly in my case) to find someone I truly click with and have them accept me and tolerate my differences.

Our differences aren't a bad thing, they make us who we are. But many cannot tolerate the way we are. Our awkwardness in conversations, our lack of or too much eye contact, our shyness, literalness and sometimes inappropriate responses in conversations.

My particular issue is I ask too many questions; clarifying, I'm always trying to prevent making mistakes (particularly in the work environment). I don't like to make mistakes.

By asking and clarifying I feel I'm making a mistake in its self and I worry about how people feel about my excessive question asking. This is something I can't really help especially because the people around me are so critical of me when I do make a mistake.

I do make an effort to talk and be friendly, but it just seems too hard to try and establish new friendships. I retreat and find it easier to sit on my own and do my own thing (When I don't have my best friend with me).

Today's blog post is just about my recent thoughts to let you all know how I'm feeling at this moment. I can summaries this in one sentence: I feel alone in an environment of people who cannot tolerate me.

Can you relate?

Get to know me! Facts about me!

16 Facts About Me!
Not many of you know much about me and I really don't want to be known as Anonymous!
So.. I thought it would be a great idea to share some facts about me! I would really like to get to know you too! So feel free to leave some facts about you in the comments! :)

Fact 1: I am a huge animal lover! I love cats and frogs especially!
Fact 2: I love to photograph
Fact 3: I've lived in QLD, WA, NT, NSW and TAS! And visted everywhere else in Australia.
Fact 4: I'm probably one of the nicest people you will ever met.
Fact 5: I actually like school work.
Fact 6: One you all know: I have Aspergers and I am proud of it.
Fact 7: I've lived on an Aboriginal community and I learned part of their language.
Fact 8: I am 16 years old!
Fact 9: I find happiness in the simplest things
Fact 10: I am super shy when you first met me, but I am fun and crazy when I'm comfortable around you.
Fact 11: I am always honest to my friends, and they can trust me with anything.
Fact 12: My mum is my hero. ♥
Fact 13: I want to become a proffessional Jeweller
Fact 14: I appeciate my family and friends very much <3
Fact 15: I have the weirdest sense of humor! But my close friends love it!
Fact 16: I like to make jewellery in my spare time... Made from buttons!

Below is a picture of a necklace I made, and a picture I took of a rose from our garden.

Hand-dyed Rainbow Button Necklace

Most Common Cause Aspie's are Bullied

A majority of teens and children with Aspergers can be accurately described as being socially naive, meaning that they are not street smart and they are unquestioning of peers. This naivety and their great need to belong often leaves Aspies open to being set up or manipulated by peers.

Aspies are often targeted and manipulated by bullies. They are susceptible to pranks and easy to fool. This leaves them open to being misled and forced into situations where they may exhibit reactions and or emotions uncharacteristic of neurotypical people.

"Aspies have limited social understanding, they do not recognize social meaning, context, cues and consequences." (Tony Attwoods, 2008)
The targeted Aspie is left feeling humiliated and wounded when the social consequences set in.
Adults or peers who were not witness to the situation take for granted the Aspie’s ability to negotiate social situations.

Can you relate?

~ Molly xo